Some of the key questions dating and courtship partners are asking is how to control the flow of their relationship. People are worried that their efforts don’t seem to take the relationship towards their intended destination.
Here are some ways you can influence the course of your dating and courtship relationships.
1. Know What You Want
It is important to know what you want in every venture before starting it. This is the same in the affairs of the heart. When you decide to date, be clear of your objective. Dating can be for the learning of social skills or marriage. Define your objectives before hand and it would help on how you respond to developments in the relationship. Start with the end in mind.
2. Communicate
Communication is the key to influencing people and events. Effective communication will sway others to your point of view and enable you control the course of events. The secret to effective communication is asking questions about everything on earth – no holds barred.
3. Passion For Life
Passion, they say, sells. Passionate living will attract others to you and persuade them to want to stay close to you. To live passionately, you need to be committed to a cause, project, service or anything that is creative. You can be the flame that people need to fire them up. If you are enthusiastically devoted to a cause, your partner might find his or her own fire for life in your own efforts and would, therefore, stick around to enable the relationship grow towards your objective.
4. Set Standards And Remain Consistent To Them
Set standards of moral behavior and quality dating from the onset and remain consistent to them. If you fail to set standards or you are inconsistent in the maintaining of your standards, you will not only give conflicting signals, you will give yourself out as unreliable.
5. Listen
We all like to be listened to. Being able to listen to people increases their connection to us. Active listening is an essential part of effective communication, which is vital to art of influencing people around you. You know the feeling when you are discussing with someone and the person’s mind is elsewhere. When people know that you are keenly listening to them, they are more attentive to your own communication.
6. Be Likable
It is easier to drive people to your side when they like you. You gain this ability to be likable if you show genuine interest in others and care about them. If you have a date you would like to advance your relationship with, see that you show that the person and your budding relationship are important to you. People usually respond with equal or more of the same thing we give to them. For the avoidance of doubts, caring about people does not include premarital sex.
7. Show Confidence
If you act and speak with confidence, people will rely on your counsel. It is easier to make people see things your way when they feel you can be trusted.
8. Reduce Availability
People give more value to things that come in limited quantities. You can remember how scarce communities cost more in the market. So while in a relationship with someone, try to have a life of your own. If you are too available to the other partner, he or she would feel you are needy or pressuring them.
9. Be Positive
A sunny disposition and a demonstration that there is hope exert great influence on people.
10. Prepare To Quit From the Onset
This is a critical fall-back mindset. People suffer and hang out in relationships that are not going anywhere for too long. Plan on dating people for keeps – that is to say, date people with a view to picking them up again in future. Quit a relationship before you become enemies with those you meet.
Source by Francis Nmeribe
